It's just hair

Hi my Lily Buds,

Back again with this week's blog post. I hope this post finds you all in good spirits and health. Let's get to to it!!!!

HAIR! It' s straight,natural, permed, braided, kinky, curly, colored...which ever way to choose to wear you're hair ladies is your business. This does not define you're queendom, neither does it take away from it. I prefer to wear my hair in its natural state with little to no heat and harsh chemicals. This decision has been a gradual change that took me some time to become fully comfortable with. With any major change it takes some getting used to and I never regretted the decision of shaving all my hair off (went Brittney Spears on them..without the crazy) and never looking at ( perm aka creamy crack) again but I wouldn't be real with you guys if I didn't express my lack of feeling like a "real" woman because of something so trivial as changing my hair. Many times in this society we are praised and or condemned based on appearance alone.

Getting to my point and back to more relevant times there has been many occasions over the last 2 or 3 years where primarily men judged me so harshly and were very critical of my hair. This has happened as recent as today. Now as I grow older I understand this taking pride in yourself and your counterparts won't be accepted by everyone in this life. But when its coming from the mouths of black men and very seldom women the burn stings that much more. What's happened to us is saddening but I refuse to revert back to what is widely accepted just to gain understanding from someone who clearly doesn't understand themselves. Don't use your ignorance of a topic as the reason as to why you dislike something. Now this isn't saying most folks hate my ( bush ,fro, afro) call it what you like its just hair and extension of who I am. For every negative comment I get, I typically get 5 positive ones throughout my day (insert big cheese smile emoji) . Many women want to wear their hair natural but this stigma society has over hair that doesn't involve ( edge control, weave glue, and a flat iron) is a real struggle to overcome.

Loving yourself however you decide to rock ya crown is your God given right. The way you react to others doing the same is all on you. Be "conscious" of that.
Love y'all
XO

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Hello my Lilly Buds,


I've missed you all tremendously. Please forgive my absence, life really got in the way big time. And I was in love so you know how that goes ( lol). I hope you all have been doing great. Firstly I'd like to present you with the new revamped version of this blog. It will no longer just include my OOTD looks. I want to add more substance and more depth to this blog. So from now on you can expect all topics from sisterhood tips and advice I've been learning to just my real life thoughts and feelings on multiple topics. My life as changed as a woman ( still changing). I guess you can say I'm growing up and my interests are changing too.
BACK to the topic at hand today. Healing in secret. What I mean is many times we have our hearts broken(by boyfriend,friends etc) and bottle that joint in like some kind of precious stone worth keeping. I have been so guilty of this myself but ladies ( because that's who I primarily relate to, not to proclaim men don't hurt either) it's ok if things are not ok. One thing I always say is "women can bond like crazy over a broken heart" we all have our stories. However many times we aren't willing to talk about this, unwilling to purge that heavy load off our backs. I too struggle with this. So just because your heart has taken a beating unlike any other trust that you will be healed. Scream that from the mountain top until you believe it. I say these words to myself and to any other woman having a tough time remembering how damn worthy she is. Don't continue to carry that baggage, it'll give you a  hunch back and than you wont be able to hear heels any longer, and who in the world would ever not want to put a cute pair of  heels on whenever possible??? LOL

Seriously let it go, talk it out, write it out, forgive yourself and move on!

XO
Markia